Lotsa Jello Shotsa

There Has To Be A Night Before

Apparently, the night before the Indianapolis 500 there is this crazy party on Georgetown. Girls are showing their titties left and right is the legend. I decided to check it out. I spent all day with my friend Tobi and her brother Doug and his wife Gerri at Doug and Gerri’s house just a mile from the track. I didn’t take any pictures during the day because I was feeling out the situation. By the time night rolled around it felt right. Here are 15 of those images.

1. The pie this man is dishing out was made by a girl so drunk that she dropped her cell phone in the porta-potty. If I ever do that then that phone is just gone. I don’t want it. But some dude got it out with a post hole digger and she rinsed it off and let it dry on a paper towel. It was still there the next day. No idea how that will end.

2. This is just one of the intermittent fireworks that were going off though the evening.

3. One dude brought a wagon full of Jello Shots and Rummy Worms (Gummi Worms soaked in rum overnight)

4. Dude in a Mullet wig.

5.Gerri is pretty.

6. This was this guys first 500 so they called him The Rookie. It was my first 500 too. They just called me Jed.

7. This is the Rookie and maybe his brother? I don’t know. I got introduced to like a billion people. I really like these dudes but I have no idea what their names are.

8. This is Tony. The next day he was so drunk he could barely stand. But he sure could rollerblade.

9. Tobi Didn’t stop texting all weekend. She never answered one of my texts.

10. This is a Repsol CBR stopped in traffic.

11. This is Chad talking shit to the people on the Repsol CBR stopped in traffic. Seconds later Chad’s pants were falling off and het set his beer on a truck to pull them up. I took his beer off the truck and the guys in the truck thought I’d stolen a beer. They were a little mad. But I defused the situation like a motherfucking boss. Explain and apologize. Poof. No beef. (Notice that Chad is wearing a shirt that has an outline of the Chad the African Nation that reads “Chad is Rad”)

12. This is a dude give an old old woman Mardi Gras beads. I guess she showed here boobs to him. I guess he wanted her to.

13. These two just seemed like the perfect couple from behind.

14. Trust Jesus.

15. I don’t know what this cart is for. But it is undeniably awesome.

You might have noticed that there are no titties in this gallery. That’s because I didn’t see any. There were a few girls flashing them. But it was like a PG13 movie where just as they come out, a shadow obscures them or a passing child with a bunch of balloons walks by. It’s okay. I’ve seen them before. Man, they’re great.